Priority
by Anonymous033
Summary: Ray has returned, the truth has come out, and Tony finds it necessary to make Ziva a promise.
1. Chapter 1

**Summary: Ray has returned, the truth has come out, and Tony finds it necessary to make Ziva a promise. Written with the assumption that several hours have passed since Ziva found out about the truth and confronted Ray about it.**

**Disclaimer: I finished my thesis! Hehe. I would sell it to buy NCIS, but paper isn't worth much... (unless it's an NCIS contract, of course. I can haz one?)**

**Spoilers: Ray arc; minor 7x24 "Rule Fifty-One". Allusion to Rivkin; references to 8x24 "Pyramid" and 9x01 "Nature of the Beast", and 6x02 "Agent Afloat". Implied pre-canon relationships on Ziva's side ... lol.**

**_Okay... _I know I've written a fic where Ziva finds out about Ray's lies before, lol. In my defense, even though the general structure of this story is pretty similar to that one, the thought processes that underlie their conversation and actions are pretty different. Don't diss before you've read.**

**Also, this is still not ... you know, very _Tiva-ish _Tiva. Give me a break; she'd just broken up with Ray! Haha :)**

**Enjoy; please review!**

**-_Soph_**

* * *

><p><strong>Priority<strong>

It's not from her that he first hears about it. Gibbs is the one who tells them – him and McGee – about Ray, about how the CIA bastard had been working with her father for months, behind her back. When he hears the news, his blood boils. He wants to hurt Ray so badly that the urge to hunt down the man just about sends him grabbing his Sig.

And then he looks across the bullpen and realizes, with sudden fear in his heart, that he has not seen her since that morning. He casts an alarmed look at his boss, and a nod from Gibbs gives him leave to whip out his phone and dial her number in a hurry.

To his surprise, she actually answers on the fourth ring. "Tony," she says, and he hates that her voice sounds so _broken_. The urge to kill Ray intensifies. "Do we have a case?"

"No." He wants so much, _so much _in that moment to be already by her side. "Ziva, where are you?"

There is a pause before she answers. "I'm outside the Navy Yard." Another long pause. "I take it you have heard. About Ray."

"Yeah." It's his turn to pause, and he licks his lips. "Where outside the Navy Yard?"

"You don't have to look for me," she tells him quietly. "I am not hurt and I won't do anything stupid."

"I gotta see for myself, though," he admits even more quietly, and regrets the confession the moment it exits his mouth.

It turns out to be the right words after all, because she sighs and tells him she's hiding out in a café just outside the gates. He promises to be there within ten minutes.

xoxo

It takes him just seven minutes, and the sight that greets him when he approaches makes his heart clench painfully. She is sitting with her back to him, but he can tell that she's utterly dejected; she's slump down in her chair with her head bent over something she holds in her hands. An untouched milkshake, of all things, sits on the table before her.

He walks over and resists the urge to just pull her into a hug. Drawing a chair up to her instead, he settles into it and gazes at her. She doesn't look up. She simply takes a deep breath and reaches over to press into his hands whatever she was holding.

He stares at the little velvet box. Simple, unmarked. Completely nondescript, and yet is meant to hold the one thing that is of the utmost importance in the world. "Engagement ring," he whispers, and he doesn't know why he is suddenly feeling so heartbroken when she's the one who looks it.

"Box." She takes it back. "Engagement ring box. No ring."

"Oh my god," he says hoarsely, and wonders if Ray could be so _callous _as to play with her heart like that.

She shudders against her will and nods bravely. "He never planned to marry me, did he?"

He can't help it just then. Disregarding the aluminium armrest that presses into his stomach, he leans over and takes her into his arms. She shudders violently once more as she buries her face into his shoulder, and he strokes her back.

It is barely a few minutes before she leaves his embrace, straightening up and looking at him for the first time; and even though her eyes are completely dry, her cheeks are suspiciously pale and tear-stained. She gives him a joyless smile. "You should go back to the Navy Yard." He starts to shake his head, but she interrupts with, "I am fine."

"No, you're not," he tells her firmly, and a flash of annoyance crosses her eyes at his stubbornness.

"I am as fine as you can expect me to be, Tony. What do you want, for me to smile like today is the happiest day of my life?"

"I don't expect at all for you to be fine," he answers sharply, trying to ignore the way her words twist something in his gut. "That's kinda why I'm here."

Her face crumples a little, and she looks away. She swallows a few times. "I really am fine. After all … what else is new?"

"What do you mean?" He frowns.

"I have a track record." Her eyes meet his, and they are no longer quite as dry. "With men. I … they have a habit of being married to their jobs. And I have a habit of wanting what I can't have. Which is strange, because coming from Mossad, I know what it's like to be dedicated to nothing but your work. I understand all that. I just hoped Ray would be different."

He breaks eye contact, guilt swirling in him a little bit because _yeah,_ he has never dated her, but all the same he has on occasion been one to put his job before her. His mind flashes back to a time months before, when she had compared him with Ray. He had resented it then – as if he needed any more reminding of the CIA agent than he was already getting – but with the sudden clarity of hindsight, he understands now that she had been right. Even if she doesn't know it, she is, to him, the single most important woman on Earth. And yet … he had not deemed fit to pick up the phone and call her even once, during his assignment.

"I know it's selfish," she continues when he doesn't say anything, and he forces his attention back to the present. "And … I know it's stupid. Ray's CIA; I knew what I was getting myself into. I guess I forgot … I don't even mind that much that he was working with my father. I just wish he had told me. But that's all part of my life. The lies and assignments and secrets. It's not something I can change, so I need to accept it."

He feels something a lot colder than guilt grip his heart. "You can't accept it, Ziva. That's not – you deserve something better."

"It doesn't matter what I deserve. Everyone deserves better. But right now all I _have _is an empty ring box." She places it on the table and shoves her empty hands into her coat pockets. "I broke up with Ray. So … I have nothing. Perhaps some dreams aren't meant to come true. I just need to accept that."

"You can't give up on your American Dream so fast … I mean, you just became one of us," he protests weakly, because he doesn't know what else to say.

She smiles sadly. "Yes. But I can't spend my life dating men and wondering if each one is the One, only to have them leave me for a work assignment or something else. I can't take it."

"Not all men are like that."

"The ones around me are." Her expression turns horrified and she shuts her eyes. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"

"No, you're right." Her eyes snap open in shock. He clears his throat. "I'm sorry. I should've called."

She furrows her brows in confusion. "Called?"

"Yeah. Back when … you know, during my assignment. And … you know, when I was an agent afloat. I should've called you, Ziva. You deserve better from me."

Her expression softens, and she offers him a small smile. "You never had the obligation to."

"Yeah, but it didn't have to be duty." He hesitates. "You matter more than that."

She shakes her head. "Look, I'm not your girlfriend or your wife or someone important, and … I understand if you have to put your job before me, Tony."

"NCIS _doesn't _come before you." He runs a hand through his hair in frustration. "You know, I don't know why I never called or replied to your emails. Maybe it's just bad habit. But I want to break it – that habit. 'Cause … you deserve more. And hey, you want a man who puts you before his job and tells you about it…" He tapers off and gives her a sombre nod. "I'm sorry, Ziva. I know it's not much. Just, if you ever want me around…"

A slight smile curls the corners of her lips, and she reaches over to give his hand a squeeze. "Thank you, Tony. It does mean a lot."

"Yeah?" He blinks down at her hand, covering his. Slowly flipping his hand over so that he can lace his fingers with hers, he gives her an answering squeeze. "'Cause I know I'm not Ray. But I'm good 'til you find that man who will … you know, worship the ground you walk on and put you on a pedestal and shower you with roses every day, or whatever you want. And I'll be there to cheer you on when you find that guy 'cause let's face it, Ziva, the only point to being an American is to live out your American Dream."

She chuckles softly at that. "Will you be good after that?"

"I'm good whenever and for whatever you want. Just say the word."

"I will." He glances at her, startled by the shakiness in her voice. "I will hold you to that promise."

"I'll be expecting you to."

She looks away again. "You do know what you're promising, though? To be there … to put my needs before work."

"Yeah." And he falls silent, because he can hardly say that he would put her above all else if he could. In the end, he manages to add, "Always."

She stares at the ground for a few heartbeats. And then, she disentangles her fingers from his and slowly slips her arms around his body. "Thank you."

He hesitantly reciprocates. "Always," he repeats to the woman he loves more than life itself, and her grip around him tightens.

He strokes her hair and wonders how come his eyes are suddenly so wet.


	2. Chapter 2

**I'm back! Hehe, I know, I marked this story as "Complete" and now I'm continuing it ... LOL. Can I use "I'm a woman, and women are indecisive" as an excuse? :D**

**At any rate, this chapter takes place about four days after the first ... why four, you ask? Well, I don't know XD it's actually very bad luck in the Chinese culture, but I guess I'm not one for superstition. "Four" seems to be a good number in these circumstances! Also: there will be another chapter to complete the story, and this chapter will involve two story lines which, really, just complicates things.**

**Dedication: To Sa, who thinks Ziva is the most incredible ever.**

**Spoilers: Ray arc; reference to Tony's assignment from Pyramid and Nature of the Beast.**

**Warnings: While with a happy ending-ish, this fic has slightly angry Tiva in it. It is, without a doubt, an _angsty _chapter.**

**Enjoy; please review!**

**-_Soph_**

* * *

><p>He wipes his hands nervously on his trousers as he climbs up the stairs and approaches her door, because he doesn't know how she's going to react. <em>It's too soon.<em> It's too soon for him to be leaving again. It's too soon for her to believe he won't break his promise; and it's too soon after she got her heart shattered, for him to be comfortable with having to disappear from her life for months. _It's too soon, _his mind screams, and just as he comes to a stop in front of her door, he realizes that it will _always _be too soon.

How could he ever leave her again?

The knock on her door is shaky, and he is hardly surprised by the few minutes' interval before her shadow darkens the peephole and her voice calls out uncertainly, "Tony?"

"Yeah, it's me, Zi. Open up."

There is another long pause before his cell phone rings, and he fishes it out of his pocket to recognize the caller ID as _Ziva_. Perplexed, he puts the phone to his ear.

"You don't want to see me right now," she says quietly when he's answered, and his heart skips an unhealthy beat because she sounds like she's been crying.

"Why?"

A sniffle. "Ray visited."

"What? What did he do? Did he hurt you?" He bites his lip when he belatedly realizes that it's a stupid question to ask ninja-Ziva. Thankfully, though, she doesn't laugh at him.

"No. He didn't hurt me. He … he gave me a ring."

And just like that, he feels the ground give way under his feet. He opens and closes his mouth at his phone, trying desperately to think of something to say—congratulations? His sympathies? Cheers? _What?_

"I guess he did want to marry me, after all," she says even more quietly, and he can hear the break in her voice. "Tony, please say something."

He opens and closes his mouth a few more times, and in the end the only thing he can muster the strength to utter is, "Open the door. Please."

So she does. And when she does, her eyes are so red-rimmed and her face so puffy that he becomes very much less sure she said "yes".

He clears his throat and manages to ask, "What did you say?"

She shifts on her feet and beckons him in; and it isn't until he's entered the hallway that he realizes the ground never gave way beneath his feet after all, and that he'd been standing in front of her door the whole time, gaping at it like a fool. She closes it and shrugs without looking at him. "I said I'll think about it."

He feels an irrational rush of anger and jealousy run through him, and tries to shake it off. "You'll think about it?" he asks, and the look she gives him suggests that his voice sounds just as strangled as it feels.

"It's a marriage proposal … I can't dismiss it easily."

"You want to marry him?"

She twists her hands and shifts on her feet again, and when she looks at him he suddenly gets why she'd not wanted him to see her. Poor woman, she must've been crying for the whole night. He finds his feet moving of their own accord, shuffling forward until he can link his hand with hers. _No ring, though, _he notes. Somehow that makes him feel better about touching her.

She shudders when he does, but allows him to hold her hand. And then she drops her gaze. "I don't know."

"It's not a very hard question."

"It is for me. I don't want that … _life_ anymore, Tony, but he asked me to marry him. He asked me to marry him," she explains, as if that makes any sense at all.

"It's a request, Ziva, not a threat."

She looks at him with disbelief. "And how many times have you heard me being asked it?"

He blinks, and miraculously comes to understand both _everything_ and _nothing_ in that moment. His heart leaps into his throat and he dares to question, "You're telling me you wanna marry him because no one else asked?"

Her face closes off faster than he can retract his words, and she wrenches her hand from his. "I'm telling you that I want to marry him because I love him and even if he lies, he's still the only one who loves me back. You have a better solution, Tony? You'd like me to say 'no,' and wait around and see who else is willing to sweep me off my feet? Just like in the fairy tales, yes?" She takes a step closer and snarls into his face. "_Wake up, Tony._ Look around you. There is no fairy tale. There is only _me,_ with my blood-stained hands and my _past _and my lies, and don't think I don't realize the irony of my wanting someone who doesn't lie when I am practically constructed from lies. He is all I deserve; he is all I need. _He loves me enough to propose to me. _You do not think that I can love him enough to accept his lies?"

"_Do _you love him enough to accept his lies?" he asks, his throat suddenly dry and scratchy; and he doesn't know why of everything she said, the word "can" is the one that sticks in his memory and rings in his ears.

It takes two heartbeats for her eyes to stop widening and for her to look away. She breathes deeply, _in, out, in, out, _as if she's trying to hold back her tears; and then she finally says, "I can learn to."

"Funny. I thought you wanted your American Dream. Ray—"

"_Stop _with your American Dream. This is _real life_, Tony. I am never going to have that perfect husband with the perfect house and the perfect kids and the perfect _picket fence. _I am willing to take what I can get. Haven't you ever settled for second-best before?"

"No, actually, I haven't," he says sharply, and something flashes through her eyes. "I tried, with EJ—I just learn to do without. It's too hard, learning to settle for second-best."

She stares at him all conflicted, shock and anger and sadness and confusion warring one another behind her eyes, so in the end he sighs and forces himself to take up her hand again. "I just don't fancy seeing you show up for work every day looking like that. I—I can't. Ziva, I can't see you like this and not want to punch Ray's lights out. I mean, if you wanna marry him and all it's still your choice, but _what can I say? _I only want the best for you."

Oddly enough, the last sentence is the one that makes her tear up again, and she tiredly brings her free hand up to cover her face. "'The best' was never an option for me, Tony."

"Nonsense. Look, I know you've—"

"No. I've seen the best. It—it doesn't work for me. It … doesn't want me."

He frowns and tries to figure out if her personalized manner of speaking English is what's confusing him right now. "What?"

She exhales. "I can't make it clearer than that—not if I'd like to keep my dignity tomorrow. Okay. I promise I will take your words into consideration, Tony. I know Ray is not the best for me. And you are right. Maybe he is just not worth it. But I—I wish…"

He raises a hand to cup her cheek, and a tiny smile curls the corners of her lips as he rubs her cheekbone with the pad of his thumb. "You'll find someone who is worthy of you someday, Ziva. You _will. _I swear, woman, you gotta see past your 'blood-stained hands'. I mean, you just gotta see how beautiful you are."

She chuckles, and his heart skips another few beats—this time in a good way —when he sees that sparkle in her eyes which never fails to make him fall in love with her all over again. And then she leans forward and presses a gentle kiss to his cheek in thanks, and suddenly he's tingling all over, like a teenager who's just been generously bestowed a caress by his crush.

And then, of course, she _has _to pick that moment to furrow her brows and say, "Tony, what are you doing here? I didn't realize you were coming."

The purpose of his visit comes rushing back to him, and he can only grasp desperately at the remnants of the warm feeling in his heart, before giving up and telling her, "Vance called me to his office. After you left."

Her eyes grow wary. "And?"

"… I have another assignment … that requires leaving the country for months."

"W-what?"

His heart wrenches terribly at her expression; he's not sure she's aware of how horrified she looks. He pulls her into his arms in a last-ditch attempt to make her smile again. "There's no one else to do it," he justifies lamely, even as she buries her face into the curve of his neck.

"There never is."

And he's pretty sure that if his skin were any fairer, he'd be visibly pale by now. His promise to her from a few days earlier pops into his mind, and pain sits heavy in his chest as he taps on her arm lightly to get her attention. "No. Listen. I can say 'no', if you don't want me to do this. Vance will understand…"

"No. He won't, and you know it. Gibbs wouldn't understand, either. I don't want you to risk your job for a promise you made me, Tony … it's not worth it."

He tightens his grip on her. "Yeah, but I don't wanna pull what I did the last time I had an assignment."

"You don't have a choice."

He opens and closes his mouth again, and for the second time that night, he's at a loss for words. He _really _doesn't want to go on the assignment anymore. Yet … he isn't particularly keen on getting fired, either. Sighing, he leans his head against hers, and she jumps a bit at the unexpected contact. "Isn't there a middle ground here somewhere?" he grits out through his teeth.

She is silent for a long while, until he contemplates asking her if she's mad at him. Before he can say anything, though, she breathes out and replies in a tiny voice, "I'd like it very much … i-if you could send an email or two."

It's his turn to fall silent, but it takes him less than a minute to make up his mind that no matter the risk, he _will _do as she needs him to. So he kisses her hair and whispers back, "Every week."

"That could be dangerous."

"I don't care."

She lifts her head and shoots him a stunned look. "You really intend to keep your promise."

"Well … shouldn't have made it if I can't keep it."

"Yes, but I don't want you to put your life in danger for me."

He gives her a quirk of the lips and avoids her eyes. "Already have."

He feels her gaze drilling metaphorical holes into the side of his head for an eternity, before she settles for pulling him closer and laying her head back onto his shoulder. "Promise me you'll come back."

"Uh, that promise might be harder to kee—"

"_Promise me you'll come back._"

"Can I promise I'll try my best?"

She is quiet for a moment. "Since I don't want to be mad at you if anything happens … I'll take that promise."

"Yeah." He hesitates. "Don't suppose I can ask one of you too?"

"Yes?"

"Keep me updated on the Ray thing? I like interfering with your love life."

She chuckles again, and turns her cheek into his shoulder. "Okay. I swear upon my life."

His kiss to her hair lasts for a few milliseconds longer than necessary this time.


	3. Chapter 3

**Final chapter! Sorry I took so long with this; I was ... busy with another fic XD**

**This chapter spans 8-9 months, beginning right after Tony leaves on his assignment. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS or the _Avengers_.**

**Enjoy, and please review!**

**-_Soph_**

* * *

><p>The elevator dings, and she lifts her head out of reflex. She doesn't turn back to look because she's never had that habit, but it takes her longer than it should to realize that she won't hear his cheerful voice floating into the bullpen as he struts in talking about some movie he watched last night.<p>

She dips her head and tries to pretend she doesn't miss him after all. He's to be gone for months; there's no point in missing him so soon after his plane took off.

Funny, though. It's only been a few hours. Maybe it's just because she doesn't work with Ray, but she doesn't remember having missed her boyfriend as much as she does Tony.

She sighs and continues writing, and when Gibbs strides in barking "Grab your gear", she's glad for the case that will keep her occupied for at least a few days.

xoxo

She's still at work when a message pops up telling her she has new mail. Her inbox is opened without more enthusiasm than usual, but her heart suddenly skips a beat when her eyes land on the _From _column and she sees his name. She reads the email:

_Helloooo. Plane's landed. Gonna be briefed tomorrow. Wanna say Hi._

_Yeah, I know I sound lethargic and all but in my defence, I'm jet-lagged! Could you by any chance ask Gibbs to mail some coffee over?_

_Gotta go now. See you soon, Zi._

_-Tony_

Smiling a bit, she types her reply with a surprising amount of eagerness:

_Hi. I hope your flight went well._

_I would ask Gibbs to mail you the coffee, but we don't know what address to put and it'd be a shame to waste good coffee on you, anyway. I wish you luck finding a coffee place, though._

_Come back soon._

_-Ziva D_

There are no more emails from him that night, but it is with a somewhat lighter heart that she turns off her computer and picks up her backpack to head home.

xoxo

The next email comes almost a week later, and by that time she has already settled into a comfortable three-man routine with Gibbs and McGee. It is just like when he had gone away on his assignment for SecNav, and so when she opens her inbox during lunch break to find a message from him, her eyes widen with surprise and she's left stunned for a full five seconds.

She really hadn't been expecting another email from him:

_A-hah! You haven't been expecting this, have you?_

_Can't stay long. But you wound me with your coffee joke. JSYK, the coffee place I found is awesome._

_How are things on the Ray front?_

_-T_

Putting down her sandwich, she writes him a reply:

_Yes, I have been expecting it. :)_

"_JSYK" is a weird name for a coffee place. How do you read that?_

_I have not replied to his proposal. I don't think I want to reply._

_-Ziva D_

xoxo

Another week passes before his responding email, calling her on her lie and informing her that "JSYK" means "Just So You Know". He asks her why she doesn't think she wants to reply to Ray's proposal; she tells him she's not particularly keen on speaking with Ray. He advises her the following week not to leave the man hanging. She honestly doesn't know what to say to that, so she deliberately ignores the topic and settles for telling him about the wellbeing of the rest of Team Gibbs.

And just like that, they establish the pattern they will keep for months.

One week, Ray calls, asking her if she has her answer yet. She tells him she hasn't made a decision, and when he hangs up, she spares a moment to mourn the fact that their relationship is no longer like it used to be.

A month later has Tony telling her that he's met his partner-in-crime (who cannot be named due to safety purposes) for that assignment. She's a dirty blonde who looks like Scarlett Johansson and reminds him of Natasha Romanoff from the new _Avengers _movie, which he hasn't actually watched because he's been busy being undercover. Ziva wonders if they are undercover in the way he and she herself had been the first year she came to NCIS, and for some reason she feels a metaphorical glass shard pierce her heart.

The next day, she meets up with Ray to return the ring and reject the proposal. She's very, _very _tired of pretending. At this point she realizes Ray's not the only one with lies; she'd be lying to him too, if she accepted the proposal not because she wants to spend the rest of her life with him, but because she's afraid of ending up without anyone by her side. She now knows, even if he doesn't, that she never loved him enough for them to work out anyway.

Life feels even emptier after that—Tony continues with his emails, but whenever he mentions his Scarlett-Johansson-lookalike partner, she feels the same glass shard through her heart. She changes the topic every time he brings the partner up, but replying eventually becomes so hard that she contemplates ceasing altogether. So she sends him an email to that effect:

_Tony,_

_I think we should stop emailing. It must be getting hard for you, with your assignment. I wish you all the best, and hope to see you soon. Please say hi to your partner for me._

_-Ziva D_

The following week, she gets his email:

_Wait, what?_

_It's not hard for me at all! I mean, it is a bit, because I keep having to come up with reasons to return to base, but you can't do this to a man, Ziva. I said I'd write every week and I'll write every week, and I swear if you don't reply to this email I'll _kick your ass _when I get back to NCIS. Because you made a promise to keep me updated._

_Unless … you've already married Ray and didn't tell me about it. In which case, I guess that's a good reason to stop emailing me._

_H says hi back._

_Love,_

_-Tony_

The million emotions of heartbreak rush through her as she stares at the email. She feels her eyes well up for the first time since Ray's proposal, and she bends her head quickly so that no one will see her cry. She thinks it cruel irony that she wishes for Tony's comforting presence at the same time that she's crying about him.

Only Tony could ever make her feel that way.

It takes her a few minutes to compose herself, and after she does she tells him that she and Ray are officially over. And then she concedes that the emailing is fun, and that she will continue to reply to his emails. She doesn't acknowledge _H_ and she does the obligatory teasing on his having put the word "love" in the email (even though it's really the thing that has her torn in a million different directions).

His answer a week later says that he means it, and that he thinks she made the right choice ("_We'll talk about it when I go back_"). She never asks him what the "it" he means is referring to; he never tells. They move on to another topic, and their pattern is re-established.

xoxo

Another month passes by, and she has already begun to accept _H_'s position in his life when, without warning, he goes for three weeks without sending any emails. Her spirits begin to sink again, and she spends a longer time each day pretending that she has mail to reply to while staring pathetically at her mailbox instead.

She is giving herself a mental head-slap upon discovering what she's unconsciously doing and is about to close her inbox when she hears a familiar voice behind her that makes her want to launch out of her chair and fly into his arms in a movie-like style.

"Checking for email, Miss _Ziva D_?"

"Tony, you're back!" McGee greets happily from across the bullpen, but his smile drops a few notches when he sees her face, and he mutters something about his having heard rumours of new Nutter Butter packaging. He takes off at a very high speed to Abby's lab, leaving the bullpen to her and Tony.

Her own smile refuses to dim, and Tony grins at her before struggling somewhat awkwardly around her desk and sinking with a groan onto the floor next to her chair. She looks at him in dismay and slips out of her chair to sit down beside him. "Are you hurt?"

"Well, the assignment went a bit south…" he pauses and watches her hand hover over his body, trying to determine where he's hurt. "Gunshot wound to the abdomen, but the shooter wasn't very good and I was mostly just grazed. You can see the stitches if you undo my shirt."

"I'm not going to strip you."

"Now, see, I spent almost three weeks in the hospital thinking I could get you to do that…"

"They didn't tell us you were injured."

"They told Gibbs, I think. I guess Gibbs didn't tell you." He looks sombrely at her. "I'm sorry, Zi. Shoulda thought of a Plan B—'In case of emergencies or a gunshot wound, how to stay in contact with Ziva.'"

Her heart gives a painful thump, and she shoves away the longing to hug him close. "No, I understand. Your life is more important, Tony."

His expression doesn't change. "I missed talking to you, though. I missed you."

She lowers her head and keeps her voice as even as possible. "I missed you too."

"So what happened with the Ray thing?"

She takes a shuddering breath. "I realized I wouldn't be happy marrying him. I mean, I loved him, but … not enough to marry him. Even if I learnt to accept his lies … I would not be truly happy with him."

He wraps a warm hand around hers and rubs his thumb gently across her skin; she hazards a small smile at the floor. "Where is _H_?" she asks him in a soft voice, not daring to look up.

"Hillary? I left her at the base. I guess she's gone back to wherever she came from by now."

"Doesn't she worry about your gunshot wound?"

"'Course she does; she was the one who called the ambulance. But then our assignment is over, so there's no reason for her to be here." He stares at her. "We aren't _together,_ y'know."

Her head snaps up. "You're n—why should I care?"

"I've no idea." He shrugs, but continues staring at her.

She turns her head away and avoids his burning gaze. "I'm just glad you're back."

He keeps his eyes on her for a few more seconds before saying, "Just so you know, your emails were always the best part of my week."

She tries not to smile too much, but suspects herself of failing when she meets his eyes again only to see amusement sparkling in them. "Also," he adds, "I nicknamed the coffee shop I found 'Jay-Syk' in honour of your little acronymic accident."

She laughs despite herself. "Taking it too far, Tony."

"Oh, c'mon! It's a compliment!"

"Uh-huh." She slips an arm around his back and slowly helps him to stand up, her heart pulsing painfully as she tries not to think about how close she'd come to losing him. "I'll drive you home. Gibbs will understand if you miss work for one day. And I'll get you some dinner after work. Do you think you can survive on bread and water until then?"

"It's fine," he assures her. "I'll probably be knocked out till then anyway."

"Okay." And she knows he doesn't really need it, but under the pretences of support she keeps her arm around him as they walk to the elevator. He smirks at her with an alarmingly knowing gleam in his eye, yet for once she can't bring herself to care.

He's finally home, and things are right again.


End file.
